It’s a sign of the times that BMW chose an SUV as the model to commemorate 50 years of M cars.
High-performance SUVs are all the rage these days but not everyone’s happy about a bloated, heavy sports car on stilts celebrating a BMW dynasty that gave us iconic “sheer driving pleasure” machines like the M3, M2 and that mid-engined beauty, the M1.
Even BMW insiders I spoke to said they experienced a bout of “what the heck were they thinking” when encountering this brazen Beemer for the first time.
So what do we make of this latest M machine and its R3.4m asking price?
From its supersized, illuminated kidney grilles to its double-stacked quartet of exhausts, this extra-large BMW yells “look at me but get out of my way quickly” in no uncertain terms. In terms of visual Viagra and general attitude it competes most readily with that other hell-raising German sports SUV, the Mercedes-AMG G63.
The XM is equipped with all the technology BMW’s high-performance division could muster, and it needs to, to make 2.7 tonnes of SUV drive anything like an M car.
In a straight line it is a sledgehammer. The plug-in hybrid system — which pairs a 4.4l turbo V8 with an electric motor — sends a mighty 480kW and 800Nm to all four wheels, making this one of the world’s most powerful sports SUVs.
We tested it with a Vbox at Gerotek where the XM blasted the 0-100km/h in just 4.27 seconds — a highly impressive feat for a vehicle of such heft, and matching the factory claim.
The ballistic BMW also delivers the acoustics expected of an M car, with the V8 sounding a fruity roar through the four exhausts when the car’s driven in anger. It will go on to a top speed of 270km/h and there is “sufficient” power whenever you tickle the throttle. The big SUV effortlessly roars past long trucks and takes no notice of hills.
Around the corners, not so much. Traction-enhancing electrickery is impressive at keeping such a heavyweight planted on the road but there’s no way to defy the weight and high centre of gravity. With its rear-biased all-wheel drive, stability control and adaptive sports suspension, the best we can say is that the XM handles very well for an SUV.
Rear-wheel steering also helps it tuck into sharp turns and makes it more wieldy in parking lots, but you can always feel the mass. If you’re looking for sports car agility rather look towards a lighter M3 or M2.
The trouble about trying to turn a whale into a dolphin is that the XM’s suspension has been made overly stiff, and the low-profile 22-inch tyres don’t help the cause. It is not a plush ride, and even in Comfort mode the big SUV jitters uncomfortably on tar that isn’t table smooth.
The XM has a 4x4 sand mode for owners who may want to explore adventure trails on the unsuitably low-profile tyres — it’s something we didn’t try.
For all its high-performance bluster the XM doesn’t drain a fuel budget like you’d expect it to. With a petrol-electric powertrain the test car averaged an astonishingly frugal 1.2l / 100km when driven sedately in hydrid mode.
With the battery drained and driving on petrol power alone, the consumption rose to around 11l, which is still very good given the vehicle’s size and power. The XM has a range of up to 88km in pure electric mode at speeds of up to 140km/h.
A regenerative system feeds power back into the hybrid system during braking or when you lift off the throttle, but it’s not enough to keep the battery juiced up while you drive. This is a plug-in hybrid and the test car took around five hours to charge about 40km of range at a 220v socket, but it is claimed to fully charge in around four and a half hours on a 7.4kW wallbox which BMW includes in the price.
The car won’t charge on a superfast DC charger but we took it to a 22kW AC charger at a BMW dealer where it juiced up a range of 18km before the charging stopped for some reason. We have previously encountered such problems with charging cars so the technology isn’t foolproof.
Bottom line is that BMW’s average fuel consumption claim of 2.7l/100km seems achievable as long as you keep the battery charged.
At 5.1m long the XM is a big chunk of car. Cameras and proximity alarms notwithstanding, it is not easy to park. The large size makes for an impressively roomy cabin that will comfortably take a quartet of Springbok forwards.
BMW has gone to town with the glitzy interior which may feel garish to some with its bright red leather seats, 3D prism structure on the ceiling, and extensive mood lighting. One almost expects to see a roulette table in the lounge-like back seat.
The pink ambient lighting was a little too much for me so I asked the voice-controlled AI assistant to change it to more subtle blue. “Good choice,” she said.
The extravagant interior has high-quality materials and lays on luxury with features like heated rear seats with cushions, four-zone climate control and a high-end Harman Kardon surround sound system.
Stretching across the dash is a giant BMW Curved Display which can be controlled via touchscreen or an iDrive control knob, while a head-up display is standard.
A part of me struggles to take the XM seriously given it’s something of a caricature, a gaudy display of wealth that leaves nothing to subtlety with its bellicose design and casino-like cabin. The XM won’t be to everyone’s taste nor budget — though at R3.4m it represents a relative bargain in the sports SUV segment.
Is it a true M car? In terms of extravagant image and power the answer is yes. In styling the XM is all anger and menace, and it has fittingly brutal straightline performance. But the compromised ride and handling of this heavy behemoth take the edge off the hallowed M badge.
BMW XM VS THE COMPETITION
Audi RS Q8, 441kW/800Nm — R2,730,000
Mercedes-AMG E63S 4Matic+, 450kW/850Nm — R2,823,004
BMW XM, 480kW/800Nm — R3,400,000
Mercedes-AMG G63, 430kW/850Nm — R3,962,717
Range Rover Sport SV Edition One, 467kW/750Nm — R3,965,000
Porsche Cayenne Turbo GT Coupe, 485kW/850Nm — R4,128,000
Maserati Levante Trofeo, 427kW/730Nm — R4,530,000
Lamborghini Urus Performante, 490kW/850Nm — R4,950,000
Aston Martin DBX, 405kW/700Nm — R4,750,000
Aston Martin DBX 707, 520kW/900Nm — R5,350,000
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