Reports that China will allegedly send technicians to SA to secretly refurbish the De Brug military base have caused some alarm, but at the weekend the Gauteng provincial government provided some valuable perspective, revealing that the real threat to our national security is a can of red spray paint.
According to Afrikaans weekly Rapport, the People’s Republic will spend about R500m on the top-secret project at the base near Bloemfontein, importing its own technicians to do what Rapport called a redesign and upgrade.
Needless to say, this will raise all sorts of red flags, most likely over the workers’ compound, with a couple more decorating the walls of the Glorious Democratic Recreation Hall, where staff will be able to redeem accumulated Social Credit System good behaviour points for treats such as 10 seconds of unsupervised internet access.
Still, I have to confess that there’s a part of me that’s curious to see what that kind of money can buy when it’s being spent by China rather than the ANC: the whole thing might feel iffy as hell, but at least they’re not going to drop half a billion on a row of Portaloos and a misspelt sign over the front gate welcoming visitors to Da Bruges.
Politicians and security experts are less enthusiastic. According to Chris Hattingh, the DA’s spokesman on defence, giving Chinese military personnel access to SANDF equipment and possibly navy vessels is a threat to SA’s sovereignty.
I agree that it is absolutely not okay to have Chinese experts vroeteling around in our tanks and warships: it might disturb the starlings that have been nesting there ever since our military was finally defeated by the relentless neglect, corruption and dysfunction of the ANC.
Our sovereignty, however, is another matter entirely, one that’s becoming increasingly tricky as the world plays geopolitical musical chairs, flinging itself east or west in the hope of becoming a vassal of either China or the States formerly known as United.
Even the proudest also-rans are finding it increasingly difficult to pretend that their sovereignty isn’t rapidly becoming more of a subscription service. The UK, for example, continues to grapple with spending £71bn it doesn’t have on US-built F35s for the sole purpose of carrying nuclear bombs that can only be used with the permission of the US, meaning that the British military is now effectively commanded by whoever controls Donald Trump.
Perhaps that’s why the ANC in Gauteng decided to draw a line in the sand (by which I mean the metaphor, not the lines in sand that they use for roads in that province) and take a stand against the sinister enemy hell-bent on destroying this country: protestors with spray paint.
On Sunday night the Gauteng government declared that the defacing of a sign welcoming visitors to the G20 was “a direct assault on our nation and its standing in the world”, a “deliberate and malicious campaign of sabotage, designed to undermine and tarnish the image of our province and country”.
To be fair to Panyaza Lesufi and his team in Gauteng, I understand why they’re upset by anonymous protestors undermining and tarnishing the image of the province and the country: that’s the ANC’s job and the only one they’re really good at, and if you take that away from them, what’s left?
Yes, we might all be frantically dancing to the tunes of geopolitical pipers, but at least the ANC in Gauteng is standing firm and getting angry about what really matters: the advertising hoarding stapled to the façade of the Potemkin village.
• Eaton is an Arena Holdings columnist.
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